This post is continued from my post on January 23, real estate, schmeal estate

So, we got the house that we wanted. As well as two others. We only applied for um… 4 houses. One of the real estates looked to be even more disorganised than the one we got our house through. Anyway, we’re currently packing like mad (or something like that), and planning to move most of our things this weekend.

Hopefully this will be all done soon, since I really hate moving. I can’t wait to be settled in, and then we’re off to the US for our holiday!

So, it turns out we have to move. Our lease expires on Feb 25. Which is timed, oh so nicely, with the start of our USA holiday, for which we leave on Feb 27.

We’ve been accepted for an apartment around the corner from our house, and we’re trying to stall that one.. because…

The house that we want may take another day for them to process our application.

I don’t understand this – what seems to be an arbitrary delay in processing applications.
The rental market in Melbourne at the moment seems to have a bit of a surplus. Probably because of Christmas / New Year only being a couple of weeks ago.

Anyway, the other real estate was able to process our application and approve us by 11am. This agent? Hasn’t even called any of Bryce or my references.
We’ve tried to call the agent a few times today, and the guy isn’t answering his phone, or returning messages.

Given a current surplus, low current demand, etc.. Why the delay? To me, it seems like they’d prefer to lose prospective tenants and uphold some form of bureaucracy and mandatory delays, rather than make a few phone calls.

Update, I eventually got through to the agent. He was out of the office all day. They’re looking to have it processed tomorrow, before lunchtime.
We’ll see how that goes.

Although a little delayed, I thought I’d update on the situation…

Within 5 minutes of sending the fax, the branch manager had called me to personally apologise. The issue has been sorted, and the situation explained.

Apparently the card I wanted to change to was ‘so new’, that their internal systems hadn’t been updated to allow me to swap, so they were cheating the system and doing it like a new application.

I’m a little disappointed that they make customers sit through such a process. I think overall, a better experience would have been to have said that it wasn’t possible and to contact me again when they had the system in place.

Oh well.

I got a bit annoyed today at my bank. They really dropped the ball recently while I was trying to switch credit cards. I was trying to make a point, but I think some personality spilt out into my letter as well.

Anyway, I read the letter back after writing it, and thought it sounded a lot like something you’d read online as a forward.. So I sent it.

Fax to: [fax number]
From: Sam Jarrett, samjarrett@me.com. [my address here]
For urgent attention of: Branch manager, or [Person 1], or [Person 2], or anyone who will actually acknowledge this has been received!

Dear [Bank & branch here],

Hopefully this is the branch manager reading this. I’ve got a few things I’d like noted as feedback from my recent experiences:

Attached is correspondence I’ve had with your office over the past few days. It highlights that while you have not received any of these documents, they have indeed been emailed twice already.

In addition to this, I’d like to mention that your service during this “application” has been appalling. My employer informs me that not one, but two people called up to do an employment check, asking identical questions.

The second person I’d spoken to had no information of the items discussed with the first person ([Person 3], I assume?), and no email has been answered, although they have been all replied directly to emails I had received, and I did not receive a bounce message, therefore I assume should have been received.

Along with that, I’m very confused with the entire process. I merely asked to change my existing Platinum card to a new [New CC type] one of the same stature. Instead, I’ve gone on a roller-coaster ride, involving spending nearly 4 hours in a branch filling out credit card application forms (umm, why?), and being told my application was due for scrutiny of some majestical creature who would make an all-knowing decision as to if I was worthy of receiving your latest product line.

I request that you immediately contact me to clarify exactly what process I’ve gone down, if it was the most appropriate for the situation, given what I’d requested and how quickly this issue will be fixed up.

If I’d have known, going in, that this would be the process, I would have stuck with my existing service, paid off the debt, and closed the account. I notice that many of your competitors have card offerings that are similar to the “[Current card name]” card that I already have, and I’m certain that my banking business would be very attractive to them instead.

As a customer-service employee, turned programmer and user experience champion, I really have to question how much of this process was required, and if all of your customers are required to jump these hoops?

If your answer is “all of them”, I seriously recommend that you consider revising this process, as it will cost you customers. It’s not difficult to move a credit card to another provider – in fact, they try to make it easy with Balance transfer offers like your own current offer.

If, for some reason, I’m special, and this isn’t the norm, I’d appreciate an explanation as to why this has wasted so much of my time?

Thanks for your time in reading this and I am looking forward to hearing from you, unknown [Bank name] branch manager.

Warm regards,
Sam

I faxed this to them, including the previous correspondence, and the form I was requested to sign (which I still feel was unnecessary) after the first two emails went unanswered/unreceived. We’ll see how this turns out.

Nevermind the fact that most ‘Australians’ are at most one or two generations Australian prior to immigration, or that we’re apparently a country that celebrates our diversity and multiculturalism (which, I note, you can only achieve through immigration). Or that there’s supposed to be a culture of helping eachother when in need & backing the underdog. I digress.

Let me pick it apart.. seriously, there’s so much here

I drive Australian-made cars, and I believe in Australian products and buy them whenever I can.

Are there still any Australian-made cars, really?

I don’t pity the poor, I hate the way they are always crying that they are hard done by!!

What ever happened to the Australian way of “helping eachother out“?

This is AUSTRALIA….We like it the way it is and more so the way it was… so stop trying to change it to look like some other socialist country!

If we’re so Australian, why does this sound like a line out of a conservative American’s mouth? (think; USA ‘socialist health care‘!)

At a Victorian high school foreign students raised a Middle East flag on a school flag pole.
Australian students took it down.
Guess who was expelled… the students who took it down.

Which sounds exactly like what should happen? where’s the problem here? Can schools not have other any other country’s flags raised? Where’s our multiculturalism gone?

4. Dress as we Australians Do

Clearly this is a dig at burqas and other typically concealing dresses – I don’t see why so many people have a problem with this? We’re fine for 14 year olds to wear next to nothing, we should be fine for those who want to dress conservatively doing so as well. This just highlights the underlying racism in this email.

Finally:

Made in AUSTRALIA & DAMN PROUD OF IT!!!!!

Nevermind your origins, mate.. unless you’re an (Australian) aboriginal.. then nevermind.

OK. I think I’ve torn it apart now. I’m substantially less angered now.

Here’s the email in its entirety after the jump

I THINK THIS GUY HAS IT ALL COVERED.
I COULDN’T SPOT ANYTHING HE LEFT OUT.

I am the Labor Party’s Worst Nightmare.
I am a White, Conservative, Tax-Paying, God fearing Australian.

I am a hard working Australian and I work long hours to earn a living.

I believe in God and the freedom of religion, but I don’t push it on others.

I drive Australian-made cars, and I believe in Australian products and buy them whenever I can.

I believe the money I make belongs to me and not some bloody governmental functionary, Labor/Greens or Liberal, that wants to share it with others who don’t work!

I’m in touch with my feelings and I like it that way!
I think owning a home doesn’t make you a capitalist; it makes you a smart Australian.

I think being a minority does not make you noble or victimized, and does not entitle you to anything.

Get over it!

I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac or any other item, you should do it in English.
I believe there should be no other language option.

I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God when and where they want to.

My heroes are, fellow Australians like Don Bradman, Steve Waugh, Alan Langer, Slim Dusty, Fred Hollows and the Aussie scientists who invented the bionic ear – missed a few I know.

I don’t hate the rich, but hate the way they always find ways to pay less taxes.
I don’t pity the poor, I hate the way they are always crying that they are hard done by!!

I know wrestling is fake and I don’t waste my time watching or arguing about it.

I believe if you don’t like the way things are here, go back to where you came from and change your own country!

This is AUSTRALIA….We like it the way it is and more so the way it was… so stop trying to change it to look like some other socialist country!

If you were born or legally migrated here and don’t like it… you are free to move to any Socialist country that will have you. (And take Julie Gillard and her group with you.)

I believe it is time to really clean house, starting with the Lodge, the seat of our biggest problems.
I want to know exactly, where the “Do Gooder’s” get their money from, and why are they always part of the problem and not the solution?

Can I get an AMEN on that one?

I also think the cops have the right to pull you over if you’re breaking the law, regardless of what race, color or creed you are, but not just because you happen to be an illegal alien and scream that they are “RACISTS PIGS”.

And, no, I don’t mind having my face shown on my driver’s license. I think it’s good….

I dislike those people standing in the intersections trying to sell me stuff or trying to guilt me into making ‘donations’ to their cause….

Get a job and do your part to support yourself and your family!

I believe that it doesn’t take all the intellectuals to raise a child, it takes two parents….

I believe ‘illegal’ is illegal no matter what the lawyers think!

I believe the Australian flag should be the only ones allowed to be flown in Australia! If this makes me a BAD Australian, then yes, I’m a BAD Australian.

If you are a BAD Australian too, please forward this to everyone you know….

We want our country back! My Country….. I hope this offends all illegal aliens.

My great, great, great grandfather watched as his friends died in the Boer War.
My grandfather watched and bled as his friends died in World Wars 1&2.
My grandfather watched as his friends & brothers died in the Depression of 32.
My father watched as his friends died in Korea.
I watched as my friends died in Vietnam, East Timor & Desert Storm.
Our son’s and daughters watched & bled as their friends died in Afghanistan and Iraq.
None of them died for the Afghanistan and Iraq Flag.
Every Australian died for the Australian flag.

At a Victorian high school foreign students raised a Middle East flag on a school flag pole.
Australian students took it down.
Guess who was expelled… the students who took it down.

West Australian high school students were sent home, because they wore T-shirts with the Australian flag printed on them.
Enough is enough.

This message needs to be viewed by every Australian;
and every Australian needs to stand up for Australia.
We’ve bent over to appease the Aussie-haters long enough.
I’m taking a stand.
I’m standing up because of the hundreds of thousands
who died fighting in wars for this country,
and for the Australian flag.
And shame on anyone who tries to make this a racist message.

AUSTRALIANS, stop giving away Your RIGHTS!
THIS IS OUR COUNTRY!

This statement DOES NOT mean I’m against immigration!
YOU ARE WELCOME HERE, IN MY COUNTRY, welcome to come legally:
1. Get a sponsor!
2. Learn the LANGUAGE, as immigrants have in the past!
3. Live by OUR rules!
4. Dress as we Australians Do
5. Get a job!
6. Pay YOUR Taxes!
7. No Social Security
until you have earned it and Paid for it !
7. NOW find a place to lay your head!

If you don’t want to forward this for fear of offending someone, then YOU’RE PART OF THE PROBLEM!
We’ve gone so far the other way… bent over backwards not to offend anyone.

Only AUSTRALIANS seem to care when Australian Citizens are being offended!
WAKE UP AUSTRALIA ! !  !
If you do not Pass this on, may your fingers cramp !

Made in AUSTRALIA & DAMN PROUD OF IT!!!!!

Drink When:

• Karen makes a reference to her breasts/Grace breasts.
• Jack diverts the topic back to himself.
• Grace whines about her personal life (two drinks.)
• Karen goes a bit lesbian. (two drinks.)
• Will produces his satisfied “It’s great to be gay” smirk.
• Anyone refers to Will as a woman, girl, or uses a woman’s name to refer to him.
• Karen instructs Rosario to do something horrible and/or humiliating.
• Karen takes a drug.
• Jack mentions a date/boyfriend.

Finish Your Drink When:

• Karen drinks.

Bonus:

• If Jack does “Just Jack”, the last person to do “Just Jack” must finish their drink.

Platform One, Melbourne CBD

Pros: Looks good! Central location
Cons: $2k minimum on drinks
Hours: 8pm – 1am

Element Lounge – Earth Room, Melbourne CBD

Pros: Cheap! $250 hire fee. 2 bottles of champagne (we all know that’s just sparkling) included
Cons: Late start to the night
Hours: 9pm – 3am

Loop, Melbourne CBD

Pros: Cheap! $300 minimum drinks. Art/movies projected on to wall = cool.
Cons: Relatively short exclusive time (3 hours)
Hours: 8pm – 11pm

Castle Hotel – Bar 56, Melbourne CBD

Pros: $1k minimum food or drinks. Open plan and simple. Extended exclusive time!
Cons: Security guard required?
Hours: 7pm – 1am

What else?

These were some of my favourites that I found online. Does anyone reading this have a better suggestion? Go for it!